Thanks for your reply. I would like to add, that CF is a real answer to inequality between the sexes. But even more egregious is that working fathers continue to treat working mothers as the primary caretaker to make career sacrifices instead of sharing the burden of childcare.

The “real” answer to the wage discrepancies between mothers and fathers (not women and men), is for mothers and fathers to take turns sacrificing opportunities in their careers. If every other time a child was sick, the father took the sick time, if the parents took turns taking overtime opportunities or opportunities to come into the office early, and so on. Then I imagine the wage discrepancy between fathers and mothers would disappear and the wage discrepancy would be more obvious between childless/free workers and parents and thus non-gendered issue.

Also, I think there is a cult of the child in our culture currently, and too much focus on getting junior to special things and hauling him all over hell and gone. If parents focused on quality time with their children instead of massive amounts of non-quality time driving them places, mothers might have more time for work.

As for stay at home cf’s, the key is most definitely doing ones share. Also the working partner has to recognize that listening, cleaning, home improvements, budgeting and financing are all paid skills and treat their spouse with respect if they are working hard.

I will address the two-earner economy idea and how it should not apply to cf’s in later posts about choices that save someone money or make someone money that CFs can make.

More on topic with this post, I absolutely agree that, regardless of gender, the stay at home partner needs to take that extra time to reduce household expenses and make the home a more comfortable place for everyone. Unfortunately I think for many people this isn’t an option, because even given the the additional opportunity the SAH partner has to optimize the budget, most costs these days are centered around having two income-earners. I also think situations like these can fall apart if the working partner feels the the SAH partner isn’t keeping up their end of the bargain

Found you via a CF blog search and what do you know. I wrote on this last week. I was so impressed w/the article that I even emailed the writer who responded w/a v. lovely note.

As a CFSAHW I believe in this 110% as long as it works for BOTH partners. So far, so good and we’re going on eight years.

If you have time, stop by and take a looksee at what other CF women had to say. V. worthwhile discussion.

I dig your blog.

Stepher